Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Taking For Granted

Lately as we prepare for Jesse's deployment(our first since marriage and kids) I can't help but realize all the little things in our life that we take for granted. It seems so simple and easy to get caught up in the every day mumbo jumbo. Sometimes there is so much to do and so much going on that we don't even take time to realize what is really important. However, because this deployment is looming even closer each day seems like a time for reflection. I don't know why exactly, and I don't really know exactly how to describe it.  But I feel like each day is somehow different. Trips to the playground aren't just trips to the playground. Snuggling to a movie as a family, isn't just a movie. Even watching tv with Jesse and the kids feels like something special. I guess you can say it's a lot easier to cope with the idea of being seperated as a family for an entire year, if we view  each day before he leaves as a blessing rather than one less day together. The other day Jesse thanked me for doing so good with the kids, and for making such beautiful babies. This made me realize something. We need to stop taking credit for something we are only partially responsible for. The Lord has blessed our lives in so many ways. Although sometimes I feel like everyone is against me, Jesse has to work a long day, the kids won't nap, Brianna won't stop crying, the house is a mess, and bills are waiting to be paid. I  have realized more now than ever I am really blessed. I have two  uber beautiful and healthy kids. A roof over my head,and food in my belly. A loving husband who supports me in everything I do and is an INCREDIBLE father to our children.  We have a steady paycheck, our own health, and Jesse stays safe each day and comes home(eventually) in one piece. I am blessed. We are blessed. So I am taking the time to slow down and capture the blessings I have in my life each day, I think it makes things easier. So we may not get around to doing all the "family pre deployment" activities. I think what really matters is right here. Jesse getting to tuck the kids into bed, hold Brianna until she falls asleep, hear  the kids giggle, see them smile, and watch them do all the amazing things they do as the become beautiful little people. So today and each day before Jesse leaves I will cherish the time we have rather than time we've lost. I will hug longer, smile more, and just breath. Because as crazy as this life is , it's our life and it's beautiful all by itself.

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